My Bucket

We must be responsible with our words. ~not today

Death of true love or loved person is too much. The reality of truly bad people and war is too much. Precious cargo, what matters most, taken. Controlling some parts of life is not possible, so we learn to let go.

I can bury my head in the sand, like the ostrich, but when I peak from the blinders hiding the truth, I see devastation. It’s possible to hide again, behind the offering of pills, alcohol and other drugs. Yet, escaping doesn’t have to be blunt (pun intended), I may also hide behind God and the church or any number of other truths.

The mantra of now is “Let’s Get Started.” When I reach the bottom of my bucket list, and the bucket is empty two things have happened. First, I’ve lived a full life. Second, my bucket didn’t hold enough dreams. Not because my bucket was small, but rather my dreams.

Relative, and naive it is, writing about such nonsense as myself. I learned long ago, conversation and writing about ones self is not good conversation. I give up on that one. If I show up and do things, extraordinary things, it’s of interest to most everyone – inspiring. Carpe’ Diem is a verb, so let’s get started.

To write about what came out of my bucket is ego, but to write what’s going into my bucket is goals. Goals are overrated, I’ll call it decisions and dreams. The only thing that can stop me is uncontrollable realities. I made a decision, “Only concentrate on what I can control.” So, let’s get started.

travel (ck backpack spain)

The road to Santiago or running with the bulls, depending on what stage of life or mood I’m in, at the point of Carpe Diem, goes into the bucket. It doesn’t matter why, I have a number of reasons, none of which makes any sense to me. No matter, in the bucket she goes. Remote alpine fly fishing, why not, it’s just a bucket holding dreams and decisions. New Zealand, yes. Tibet, yes. Labrador, why not – in the bucket – all of you.

Pushing the limits, not so much this time around. The concept left the last bucket, maybe never to return. The words “Maybe” and “In my opinion” somewhat absent from the bucket before, this round, in the bucket – I like you bunches. Listening more and speaking less, I need you in my bucket.

Love, compassion, empathy, philanthropy, courage, understanding, acceptance … all of you beautiful actions – get in the bucket and stay forever. Hate is not invited. Ego will be asked to leave more than once.  More is confusing, bigger and faster can do what they please, but sadness, broken hearts, anger you will be accepted, so into the bucket you go.

Mandolin, moreover me playing the mandolin, picking and grinning with friends, I place you, into my bucket. Friends, with whom to pick and grin, I escort you, into my bucket. A good dog, beaming with unconditional love, heal up, and follow me, inside the bucket. Spirituality, health, relationships, money, free time, hobbies, get in there.

Life will continue to present too much to handle, and when it does, I’m going to reach in my bucket and pull something out. I know what I love and what makes me happy, this all goes in to my bucket. I know things I do not love will make it’s way in; I’ll politely ask him to leave, accepting he came and was part of my life.

I’m not content with my words tonight, nor am I careful. I care, but I’m writing about me throughout, so nobody should really be interested in the first place. Carpe Diem, my friends, let’s get started.

The journey starts, not with new vistas, but with having new eyes.

~Marcel Proust

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